10 Apr Should mom move in with me? What happens to Stay NJ?

Q. My mother lives in her own home, but I think she needs more help. She can’t afford to pay an aide – neither can I. So if we sell her home and she moves in with me, how can we decide if she should pay me rent, or maybe, can I sell my home to her so we can benefit from the senior property tax benefits like Stay NJ?
— Trying to help

A. There’s a lot to consider here.

But we’re glad to hear you want to help your mom.

You didn’t say what your mom’s income is, but if her need is greater than her income, there are several strategies to consider, said Jody D’Agostini, a certified financial planner with The Falcon Financial Group in Morristown.

Selling the home is one solution.

“You can take the capital and invest it to provide extra income,” she said. “You first need to do some financial planning to see how much you would net upon the sale after paying off any mortgage and fees and commissions upon sale.”

Alternatively, you should explore her current investments to see if there is the ability to maximize the income derived, she said.

“In some situations, annuities can provide a higher guaranteed income stream for life,” D’Agostini said. “They can become more attractive with age.”

D’Agostini said she doesn’t see how your mom can purchase your home unless she sells hers, assuming it would leave enough equity to purchase yours.

“Unless her home has more equity to create additional income, you will not have the capital to provide the additional income,” she said. “The only advantage would be the tax credit, which might not support the cost of the help.”

If she moved in with you without owning the home, she would not receive Stay NJ.

She said you could explore whether a Home Equity Conversion Mortgage (HECM) would make sense.

If it is appropriate for your mom and she is age 62 or older, she could convert a portion of her home equity into a monthly income stream. But don’t sign on for something like this without consulting with a financial professional who can make sure the deal is right for her.

You can receive it in three ways; through a line of credit that you can dip into as needed, monthly payments or a lump sum. The money comes out tax-free, and you do not need to repay the money until the home eventually is sold. Then you will have to repay the principal and accrued interest, she said.

“She must be able to continue to support the property taxes and homeowner’s insurance,” D’Agostini said, noting that the loan would be federally insured but does come with fees.

“This could provide the additional liquidity needed,” she said. “If the amount to repay the loan is higher than the home value at the time of sale, you will not have to pay anything, but the bank gets the home.”

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This story was originally published in April 2026. 

NJMoneyHelp.com presents certain general financial planning principles and advice, but should never be viewed as a substitute for obtaining advice from a personal professional advisor who understands your unique individual circumstances.