15 Jan My husband won’t come to create a will. What can I do?

Q. I’ve been trying to get my husband to come with me to an estate planning attorney. We haven’t done our wills since our children were very young, and we’re now grandparents. He just doesn’t want to do it. What should I do?
— Wife

A. We’re glad that you want to make plans for both you and your husband.

But you can do it solo.

A will is specific to a single person, said Steven Holt, partner and chair of the tax law, trusts and estates practices with Mandelbaum Barrett PC in Roseland.

That means you can prepare one even if your husband does not.

“If your assets are owned jointly or pass by beneficiary designation, then, while you are married, a will is less important,” Holt said. “This is because these assets pass to the surviving spouse.”

If your spouse dies before you, assuming the assets are jointly held, he does not need a will because the assets pass to you automatically, he said. After that, your will would control the disposition of the assets at your later death.

The problem is that if you die first.

“Then there is no direction for the disposition of the assets at your husband’s death, and they will pass to the beneficiaries designated under the New Jersey statutes, typically your children,” he said. “However, an estate administration proceeding will have to be initiated by a child or other interested person, which could be complicated and costly.”

Perhaps explaining what would happen to the assets if you died first and he doesn’t have a will, and how that could make it more complicated and expensive for your children, will help get him to where he needs to be.

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This story was originally published in January 2025.

NJMoneyHelp.com presents certain general financial planning principles and advice, but should never be viewed as a substitute for obtaining advice from a personal professional advisor who understands your unique individual circumstances.